Five Types of World Cup Fans

What is it about the World Cup that brings the world together?

Why is it on this occasion that millions of people all over the world watch this game of men kicking around a ball for ninety minutes (only to result in a dissapointing tie)?

Soccer fans aside, the World Cup seems to bring interest to almost everyone, whether they enjoy soccer or not.

But, is it really about bringing everyone together or apart?

Country rivalries are the biggest reasons we watch the game. Either we want to support our country (Pakistan) or like in my case, when our country isn’t in the game, we want to support the country we like (Mexico) or the country we want to win (Argentina) or the country we know is going to win (Brazil). Sometimes, we watch the game because we want the opposing country to lose so bad (France) no matter who they play.

But where does this rationale come from?

Especially for people from my side of the world who don’t have Pakistan or India or any Muslim country playing that we can relate to…How do I pick who I want to support?

Oh…..Decisions….Decisions…

Well, in order to make things easier, most likely, you fit into one of these types of World Cup fans. Think about it.

Which one are you?

THE BANDWAGONER: Everyone I talk to wants Brazil or Spain to win. Why? Because most likely, Brazil or Spain WILL WIN. Whether you go for the team that has won the most Cups (5 in Brazil’s case) or the strongest team in the competition (España), you tend to support the team that always wins. If you don’t go much about sports, then go with one of these teams. You’ll sound smart and most likely will not be dissapointed when one of these teams win. And to make it better, both Brazilians and Spaniards are known to be pretty hot. Ahhh Fernando Torres.

THE PATRIOT: Okay, let’s face it. You live in this country [insert your country here]. You are from this country. So of course you are going to support this country. Makes sense. Pretty straightfoward. U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

THE UNDERDOGGER: This person is just a hater. You just hate on other people’s wins. You want to support teams like Algeria or Japan that might win a few games here and there and you get to boast and brag about it since you were the only one supporting, but ultimately, when compared to the grand scheme of things — your picks suck.

THE SPORTS JUNKIE: You actually are a true World Cup fan. You actually deserve to go to the World Cup. Shit, you even should be in the World Cup. You know every fact there is to know about soccer. You know that in the first ever World Cup match , Mexico got their asses beat by France. Really, France? Really? You are so elite that you don’t even call it soccer. It’s called football or futbol in your world. You are the Pele of soccer and you deserve to be President of FIFA. As for the team you support, pick whatever you want because you probably know what you are talking about.

THE SOCIAL NETWORKER: You are one of those people who love to social network about anything and everything and that is where the World Cup actually matters. You read the main headlines on your home page and that’s about as far you’ll go. Maybe you’ll even click on the scoreboard link and then update your Facebook status to something like “WHAT AN EMBARASSING GOAL FOR THE U.S!” and then post a link to the video. As poser as you may be, kudos to you guys for actually pretending to give a shit.

Well, as I am sure I did not hit everyone of you in regards to your role for this World Cup. I did not care to mention the apathetic crowd who really don’t give a crap about the game. And to you guys, I say — well, nothing. As for which one I am, I think all of those qualities resonate within me. The World Cup might not be the most exciting game to watch. It might not even be the most fairest game to watch — players are not allowed to switch jerseys after the match because “bare chests” are forbidden on the field? NOT FAIR. But, the World Cup is DEFINITELY the coolest game to watch.

HAPPY WATCHING.

Oh, Fernando.